it's movie time!
from what i have heard, this week is a non-starter for classes in black hole high. i can, according to reliable sources, expect sparse attendance at best past wednesday and a mediocre showing on monday and tuesday.
this means it is movie time.
the juniors, who have done a kickass job with some stories from tim o'brien's fantastic book, the things they carried, will be watching rambo: first blood.
for this i am exited to an unstoppable degree, and, aside from enjoying stallone's classic turn as a fuckin' crazy 'nam vet, i can justify it with some sound pedagogical reasoning (the impact of war on the individual and all that good noise).
the sophomores are not in the same, enviable, position. there is no movie for the catcher in the rye, thank christ. there is igby goes down, which, while a truly fantastic film, is probably a bit much for the kids...the heroin delivery, abuse and wanton sex might cross a few lines.
but there was hope. i was lent a film titled chasing holden by another teacher in the building who professes that she "looooves teaching catcher," and that it is her "favorite book ever."
anyone who counts it as their favorite novel is automatically suspect (not to impugn the quality of the book, but there are problems and failings there), but i was looking for anything and this was it.
this movie is fucking terrible.
it isn't just bad, no no, much worse than that. the lead is that gangly, white kid from road trip, and he plays the less-than-stable son of the governor of new york. gangly spends a couple of years institutionalized for depression or something similar, gets out, and is promptly carted off to another elite boarding school. oh yeah, and he calls his dad a phoney about nine times in that first fifteen minutes.
miraculously, gangly meets an english teacher who is cool AND edgy...not just cool OR edgy, mind you. mr. slick assigns a paper about what happens to holden after the book ends. gangly gets all hot and bothered about it, salinger refuses to be interviewed by him, and so gangly decides to kill him.
and while this is happening, gangly meets the mousy klepto with whom he decides to run off on his murder mission. did i neglect to mention that she's dying of some poorly defined "predisposition to aneurysms?" she is, by the way.
stack on top of this the wedged in mention of gangly's dead, gay brother and a bunch of creepy, vaguely admiring, references to mark david chapman, and you've got the feel good movie of forever.
this unrelenting, completely humorless, trainwreck of a movie continues as our heroes variously: escape from a swanky manhattan social club by throwing chairs through fourth story windows, save a hooker from a trick gone bad, and then steal the trick's wallet, almost rob a bank...on accident, have a relaxing breakfast with gramps, and steal a car on the way to kill salinger.
mousy klepto bites it with gangly by her side, governor dad shows up, gangly hugs him and then it, mercifully, ends...WITH NO CONSEQUENCES AT ALL FOR THE CRIME SPREE THESE TWO TEENAGERS HAVE GONE ON THAT HAS ENDED WITH ONE OF THEIR DEATHS.
it's okay, his dad is the governor.
still, i might show it to the kids out of spite if they piss me off on monday. who knows?
from what i have heard, this week is a non-starter for classes in black hole high. i can, according to reliable sources, expect sparse attendance at best past wednesday and a mediocre showing on monday and tuesday.
this means it is movie time.
the juniors, who have done a kickass job with some stories from tim o'brien's fantastic book, the things they carried, will be watching rambo: first blood.
for this i am exited to an unstoppable degree, and, aside from enjoying stallone's classic turn as a fuckin' crazy 'nam vet, i can justify it with some sound pedagogical reasoning (the impact of war on the individual and all that good noise).
the sophomores are not in the same, enviable, position. there is no movie for the catcher in the rye, thank christ. there is igby goes down, which, while a truly fantastic film, is probably a bit much for the kids...the heroin delivery, abuse and wanton sex might cross a few lines.
but there was hope. i was lent a film titled chasing holden by another teacher in the building who professes that she "looooves teaching catcher," and that it is her "favorite book ever."
anyone who counts it as their favorite novel is automatically suspect (not to impugn the quality of the book, but there are problems and failings there), but i was looking for anything and this was it.
this movie is fucking terrible.
it isn't just bad, no no, much worse than that. the lead is that gangly, white kid from road trip, and he plays the less-than-stable son of the governor of new york. gangly spends a couple of years institutionalized for depression or something similar, gets out, and is promptly carted off to another elite boarding school. oh yeah, and he calls his dad a phoney about nine times in that first fifteen minutes.
miraculously, gangly meets an english teacher who is cool AND edgy...not just cool OR edgy, mind you. mr. slick assigns a paper about what happens to holden after the book ends. gangly gets all hot and bothered about it, salinger refuses to be interviewed by him, and so gangly decides to kill him.
and while this is happening, gangly meets the mousy klepto with whom he decides to run off on his murder mission. did i neglect to mention that she's dying of some poorly defined "predisposition to aneurysms?" she is, by the way.
stack on top of this the wedged in mention of gangly's dead, gay brother and a bunch of creepy, vaguely admiring, references to mark david chapman, and you've got the feel good movie of forever.
this unrelenting, completely humorless, trainwreck of a movie continues as our heroes variously: escape from a swanky manhattan social club by throwing chairs through fourth story windows, save a hooker from a trick gone bad, and then steal the trick's wallet, almost rob a bank...on accident, have a relaxing breakfast with gramps, and steal a car on the way to kill salinger.
mousy klepto bites it with gangly by her side, governor dad shows up, gangly hugs him and then it, mercifully, ends...WITH NO CONSEQUENCES AT ALL FOR THE CRIME SPREE THESE TWO TEENAGERS HAVE GONE ON THAT HAS ENDED WITH ONE OF THEIR DEATHS.
it's okay, his dad is the governor.
still, i might show it to the kids out of spite if they piss me off on monday. who knows?
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